I am a mess.


Repudiation
February 02, 2002 @ 4:14 p.m.

And so I'm angry.

So I don't fit in your little box of what you expect a woman to be. So I have curves, lessons to teach.

So I speak.

That's the difference between me and all those other girls, the ones you find attractive.

I can play coy, I can distance myself. I will not jump at the chance to make something better when it's not needed to be fixed.

So I'm not what you expected. I never asked you to picture me.

Don't make me something that I'm not; don't dress me up in bows and short skirts and protect me from those big angry arms of the world. I didn't ask that of you.

So I'm a little scarier in real life. Doesn't that say something? Shouldn't that make you think that we're all just a little more frightening in person?

This body is mine, not yours. I never asked you to like it.

But I never asked you to look at it with disgust or rapture either. Both of them sicken me.

Look at me. Do I give a fuck what you think? Absolutely. That's why I'm always so sad. I have yet to find the mind of my own.

Put me in a box. See how loud I scream.



<< | >>

- - March 22, 2010
always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006

[navigate]
new
old
profile
notes
sign
cast
design
diaryland