I am a mess.


alone tonight, again
November 02, 2003 @ 12:51 a.m.

Maybe it's just the four hours of sleep talking. Maybe it's the coldness invading my feet, or the rain tapping on my windows. Maybe it's tonight in general, where I accomplished much of nothing. Maybe it's because I'm sick. Maybe it's because I'm craving sexual attention. Maybe it's because I feel unattractive today. Maybe it's because I feel like I don't matter. Maybe it's because of my hormones. Maybe it's the tears, emulating the rain tapping on my windows. Maybe it's stress. I don't know what it is.

I know this: I do not want to be alone tonight.

But I will be.

And I know that there will never be anything to fill this emptiness, not ever, ever again.

At least not tonight.



<< | >>

- - March 22, 2010
always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006

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