Calling death banished makes me cranky
June 27, 2002 @ 9:31 a.m.
So is it a crime if I keep expecting to see his face wherever I go? Is that really difficult to believe that I can't really be trusted with these emotions, they must come and go as they please? I sit here, growing fatter, more discontent with myself by the minute. I'm doing all I can to avoid doing anything about it, but I'm beginning to see that instant gratification and dancing around the subject is what I've been doing for far too long with very little good result.
The infection takes over, relieves anything that's considered good. Pushes it aside. Banishes it.
"Calling death banished, thou cu'st my head off with a golden axe and smiles upon the stroke that murders me."
...My favorite Shakespeare tragedy and one that seems to coincide with my thought process has been too long neglected. I need to visit it again, read the classics over and over again.
I can't stand the majority of modern fiction. It's a disgrace to the English language, to creation of rhymes and words in general. It's vulgar and bitter-tasting, no match for the flowing sweetness that its elder has to offer. There's nothing I appreciate about modern fiction with the exception of a couple novels:
~~ Elie Wiesel's "Night"
~~ Vonnegut's "Cat's Cradle"
I have not read a modern novel that's worthy of praise for a long while now. There's so much out there I can't identify with, so much sex and drugs and violence and upper and middle-class inertia.
I'm a virgin. Never done drugs. Scared of confrontation. Poor. My life is in strange chaos and I don't find literature is the sort of thing that brings me through my day.
The only reason I write poetry it seems to me is because of my short attention span and need to express my Irish temper, German broodiness, Dutch nonchalance and my Russian melancholy. That's all. Stories are far too complicated for me, you must remember things, repeat things, know things.
Poetry's just pretty words thrown together with a rather nice bow around the front.
I'm being cranky.
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always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006