Never on time
February 10, 2002 @ 3:40 p.m.
I just read over all of my entries, and I don't know whether to believe it's a little slice of Americana, or just bullshit.
I'm thinking it's the latter.
It's always been easy for me to express my feelings in this medium. Why now it's starting to become difficult is beyond me.
There are still lies, still scratches on the surface. I'm still hoping that I won't be alone forever.
But whenever I picture us, it's three. Not four. Not four.
I'm alone in my mind. Perhaps since that's the way I've always thought of myself, it's the way it's always going to be.
Rains a little on your parade, let me tell you.
And so I try to find fulfillment in greater things: in philosophy, poetry, history.
That's not fulfillment. Knowledge is not fulfillment. It's simply a distraction, a way to pass the time.
I don't know what I'm looking for. Perhaps someone to wave the banner in front of my eyes and scream in my ear that what I'm doing is wrong, and this is how to fix it.
Where are they? I thought they were supposed to be here long ago.
Like the band, they never play on time.
<< | >>
- - March 22, 2010
always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006