Chronic character
September 24, 2002 @ 10:45 a.m.
Bobby, Jessica and I went to Perkins last night and things were much better than last time. Anthony called and canceled so the three of us were together in a booth deep in Perkins, Bobby and I on one side, Jessica on the other. We goofed around for a while, ate dinner. Conversation turned serious when we discussed music. Jessica asked if we considered ourselves listeners to the underground music and not mainstream cultivators, and things developed from there.
Bobby also read us pages of freestyling he had done recently from his beautiful notebook. I wish I had handwriting like Bobby's. Mine's all flowy and 17th century English like. Bobby's is born to be in a comic strip, or a writer's notebook. It has chronic character.
I didn't say anything after he had finished reading his stuff and I think perhaps he felt a little embarrassed for reading it. But I wanted to say something intelligent, and I was so busy taking it all in that I didn't say anything.
He has all these breathtaking juxtaposing images that have devotion and bitterness bought and bound tightly together. He read and I listened and suddenly I realized that I just wanted to hug him until a little bit of Melanie wasn't such a burning rush to the veins anymore.
I see myself, and my situation, wholly and absolutely in him. I told him once that we bleed from the same vein, and unfortunately enough for the both of us, that is still true.
After we separated, Jessica and I took a quick drive up to Center Point and back for the simple reason of not wanting to go home yet. We spoke of poetry and how personal it was, and then poetry and other things in general. I mentioned Kyle's influence over my general acceptance of criticism nowadays.
I took her home, went home myself. Wrapped myself up and froze myself to sleep. Things never change.
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- - March 22, 2010
always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006