Inevitable
July 21, 2002 @ 5:05 p.m.
So.
Quiet nights here, dreaming of four different boys in my bed, all different times, all different things.
A few I can talk about, like David. Like Matt. Others, no. It's not for anyone to know about that I think about them.
That bed was too warm for both of us. It's either myself or you that I must cuddle up to, and right now, I'm thinking it has to be myself.
I just can't do this to myself again. I'm tired of loving without having love returned.
I emailed David and told him that I would make out with him. He emailed back and said "That's awesome. Making out is the coolest."
Even as a joke, it is already melancholy for me. I know what it will turn into and I hesitate, step around things. I don't want it any more than any of you want to hear me talk about it.
It's inevitable, though, isn't it?
<< | >>
- - March 22, 2010
always the same - July 01, 2008
b-a-n-a-n-a-s! - December 25, 2006
elementary again - October 29, 2006
I don't like you, but I love you - October 03, 2006